Do you ever give yourself "permission" to do something that, really, you should be doing anyway?
This summer I've given myself permission to let go a little. To let go of some obligations, and (*try*) not to feel guilty. I know I've written just recently how summer camp life can be busy and overwhelming. Working at a summer camp is a complete life itself, a full-time job, physically and emotionally. Trying to have a life--and a family--outside of that is where everything gets so crazy.
Because of that, I am learning to give myself permission to let go of some things in the summer. I'm learning healthier boundaries for myself, and my family.
I'm learning that even though my girls may not get to have fond VBS memories, they will have fond summer camp memories instead. And that's okay.
I'm giving myself permission to take a break from my C25K training, and resume after summer. I'm continuing to exercise in the mornings when I can. But, having the time to stay committed to a workout schedule felt overwhelming this summer.
I'm learning that it's okay only to write 3 days a week for this blog. And if 3 days becomes burdensome, it's okay to scale back even more. Blogging should stay fun, right?
I'm learning to let go of the guilt from not responding to every wonderful blog or Facebook Comment. Every single one of your Comments are like little breaths of fresh air to my heart, and I promise I don't take any of them for granted. (But, please know I DO apologize for not responding!! I sincerely WANT to...I'm just struggling to find the time this summer. Please know I love you, and am sending very affectionate arm punches!)
I'm learning not to look too much at Facebook or those blogs that rave about their amazing summer vacations, or even pictures of fun summer activities. My life may feel small at times, but it is MY life. I need to stretch out fully within those boundaries, soak in every inch of it, and rejoice wholeheartedly within those borders. If I am busy looking at other people's lives, I am certain to miss something beautiful right in my own zip code.
I am giving myself permission to enjoy my 20th wedding anniversary in whatever way my husband and I can pull off in the middle of summer camp. I had some really fun plans for our 20th anniversary. I had even planned to write about our love story here. But, summer has taken over in its possessive way, and I haven't even begun to write that story. I was having a little pity party the other day, about our inability to take a fabulous anniversary trip. But, then I realized, MOST of the world aren't able to stop life and take expensive anniversary trips. WHO AM I to feel slighted by that??? I have SO MUCH to be grateful for. Why are those precious things never enough? Well, I am giving myself permission for enough to be enough. My husband and I will celebrate our 20 years, regardless of location. And if I want a white side-by-side refrigerator with crushed ice on the front to commemorate those years, then so be it. (Subtle enough?? *giggle giggle*)
And here's a big one: I am giving God permission to work on my heart this summer, and take it where He leads. That's always scary for a control girl like myself. But, guess what? God is an infinitely better driver than I am. Crazy that I ever crawl into the driver's seat in the first place, huh?
What about you?
What have you given yourself permission to do lately?
Photo credit: Flickr tibchris
