Recently, my dad was going through some files, and found a letter I'd written my parents 18 years ago. He laughed so much, my mom asked him what was the matter. And when he called to tell me about it, he laughed some more.
He thought it would be a funny blog post. So, here ya go! I dedicate this to...as I wrote on the envelope..."The old man and his little ole lady."
I give you February 22, 1993:
Hi, Ma and Pa!
I am writing on this type of paper (notebook) because I'm in the middle of the Student Union writing you. I should be studying for a Research Methods class. But, who could study for Research Methods on a day like this? For that matter, who could ever study for a Research Methods. Gross! To be a little creative, and to entertain myself--(I laugh at myself more than anybody else does!) I am going to fashion the rest of this letter in a multiple choice test...
Name: Ma and Pa Moore
Directions: Please select the correct answer--OR--Select the most unusual choice to make Mary Kay's life more creative and exciting!
1. It is now twelve noon. At two o'clock, Mary Kay has to:
a. Go to class.
b. Go to the bathroom.
c. Go to class in the bathroom.
d. Go to the bathroom in class.
2. Tonight for entertainment, Mary Kay hopes Dave will:
a. Take her to the dollar movie.
b. Bring home a video.
c. Not make her study.
3. Mary Kay's favorite thing about her birthday was:
a. The fellowship of being with her family.
b. Having all of her family together.
c. The time spent with her family.
d. Who are we kidding? THE PRESENTS!!!
4. Mary Kay likes her Ma and Pa because:
a. Ma secretly sends her $300 a month (well, it's a good idea!)
b. They don't whip her too hard.
c. They let her watch t.v.
d. They're so much fun to be around.
e. Both a and d. (PLEASE a, oh please choose a!!!)
Okay, well I have to close the multiple choice test for now. My creative juices have stopped flowing. Maybe I should eat some more M&Ms. Are those what get Daddy acting so crazy?
Thanks again for such a special birthday! I just love my bracelet! By the way, will you please tell Dave he can not hock it. He thinks we could get at least 50 bucks for it at Big Bud's Pawn Shop. Big Bud said them green and blue glass rocks are real nice. He said he has a customer named JaNita that likes that shiny jewelry! Bug Bud also thinks we oughta melt down my flute into a couple of belt buckles. He said them big silver buckles get about $10 each at the flea market. He said, "What's the use of a flute if a man can't hold his pants up!"
Please refer to #1b to see why I am closing this letter now.
Write back. As ole' Skeeter says, "I need the mail!"
P.S. You'll be SO PROUD of your auctioneer son-in-law: