Buenos días, señoras y señoritas!
I'ma gonna teacha yous to make-a some salsa dat is killerz.
Hmm, am I Spanish or from the Mafia?...I need to get my persona good and set in my mind before I start typing, don't I? How about I am just plain, yet enchanting MarytheKay?
(I'm giggling a little that I described myself as "enchanting.")
Back on track, little missy. My redneck brother-in-law has a birthday coming up, and every year he requests, I mean DEMANDS, I make him another batch of my super-secret killer salsa. Every year I start feeling all uppity, because he tells me that he brags on the salsa to everybody he works with, and basically everybody he comes in contact with. (My sister has confirmed his overboard enthusiasm, much to her embarrassment.) Now, I'm not tooting my own horn here, but he tells me it is the BEST salsa he's ever eaten! I mean--you wouldn't want me to lie, would ya?
Okay, okay, I just cannot tell a lie. This salsa recipe is not my own. I must give credit where credit is due. It is from a dear friend of mine, whom I used to work alongside...oh, how I miss her! She named the salsa 4LANDSSAKE SALSA!
I especially love this recipe, because it uses canned whole tomatoes. I can make it any time of year, and still have that fresh-from-the-garden bite o' sunshine on top of a salty tortilla chip. Uhm Hmm!!!
Here are the ingredients you need:
(Stay to the end, and you get a BONUS! I'll insert the recipe there.)
And here are some of the supplies...Nice, beautiful, shiny pint jars. I have an uncanny love of new Mason jars.
And here are the cookware supplies...I use 2 pans, so as to avoid over-bubbelage. That blue wonder of a tool is a canning funnel. This will save your life--and your clean jars--and also help you get the hot salsa into the clean jar without spillage. The other thing? That is a ladle, class. Can you say ladle?
Cut up your veggies into big chunks. (Hmm, I betcha the word "chunk" makes you think of one thing, doesn't it??? Sorry about that.) Cut your veggies into big pieces. You'll be tossing everything into the blender, so don't worry about size. Size doesn't matter...
When you get to the jalapenos, I usually remove about half of the seeds, and keep about 1/3. (Ha! Just checking to see if you're awake. Remove half, keep half.)
Toss it all into your favorite blender. This is MY favorite blender. Got it for my 10th wedding anniversary, I did. Romantic, isn't it? My husband was SO PROUD...okay, so he DID hide a ring inside the blender, but it makes a better story just to say I got a blender, doesn't it?
You want to blend everything, but not puree' it. You want teeny tiny little chunks (there's that word again!)
As each batch of veggies is blended, pour into the pans. You'll want to simmer the salsa over medium heat for 25 minutes.
Afterwards, use funnel to ladle the salsa into the clean, dry jars. Pour to 1/4" of top. Make sure top rim of jar is completely dry before putting on lid. (You may need to use a clean, dry cloth to dry the rim.) Place lid on top and screw on lid.
As the jars cool, you hopefully will be hearing little "ping!"s. That beautiful sound is the jars sealing. After a couple of hours, if any jars do not "seal," you will want to store those in the refrigerator. The sealed jars may be stored in your pantry...but I bet they don't last long! You won't be able to resist!!
That's it! You are now an Official Salsa Maker!!! Do a Sombrero Dance right there in your kitchen! (Note that between filling jars, I keep my canning funnel on a plate. This keeps my counter and stove from having salsa dripped all over.)
And HERE'S the moment we've ALL BEEN WAITING FOR:
Your reward--warm salsa on a salty chip with a cold Coca-Cola! Absolutely perfect!!!
What? You still want the recipe? Okay, I guess so...
It was my prized super secret recipe...until now...
4LANDSSAKE SALSA!
1 gallon of canned whole tomatoes
2 green bell peppers
8-10 jalapeno peppers, half seeded to make a solid MED-hot salsa
5 medium onions (I used 2 very large onions)
1 cup celery
3/4 cup vinegar
2 Tablespoons salt
3 teaspoons Taco Seasoning (packet)
Directions:
Combine tomatoes, onions, bell peppers, jalapenos, and celery in blender. Pour into large pot. Add remaining ingredients (vinegar, salt, and taco seasoning) and simmer over medium heat on stove top for 25 minutes. Can the salsa into jars--or refrigerate.
*Makes approximately 12 pint jars
(Wasn't it nice of Lorelei and Rory to keep me company in the kitchen? Love 'em!)
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