Lately, my friend Carissa has been writing "Tell the Truth Tuesday" posts. I have loved reading about her Tuesday truths! I sure hope she doesn't mind if I steal her idea this week. And if she does--I will remind her that she stole the idea from someone else. If my brain weren't so tired, and my head didn't hurt so badly right now, I might just remember who. But, I don't. (Ooh! My first truth for the post!!)
Here is my truth for today:
My daughters, ages 10 and 5 1/2, have a terrible case of sibling rivalry, and I don't have a clue the best way to handle it.
Ouch. That's a pretty big mothering truth I just put out there. But, you know what? I seem to give lots of "advice" here on the ole blog--craft ideas, recipe advice, favorite things... I just need to be honest enough to say that I DO NOT have it all figured out. Umm, not even close.
But, I bet many, many of you have dealt with sibling rivalry, and have even come out triumphant on the other side. If that is the case--I would LOVE to hear your wisdom, your favorite tricks up your sleeves.
I could write waaaaay to much information here in trying to describe why I think they have the rivalry. But, I figure sibling rivalry is pretty universal, as well as its causes. So, instead, I'll just explain a few scenarios that have happened this week to help illustrate what it looks like in our family.
1. Driving home, frequently one of the girls will have to go to the bathroom. Getting close to home, she will call out, "I call guest bathroom!" (closest bathroom to the garage). Then, the other sister will call out, "No wait! I HAVE to go to the bathroom--I CALL guest bathroom!"
2. At mealtime, the girls want to sit by me. We solved it at home by assigning seats. Neither girl sits by me--they sit across the table from their dad and me. Solved! Whew! However, working at summer camp, we do not always sit at the same table, and sometimes I need to sit by guests. When one side of me is "open," both girls want to sit beside me. It becomes very disruptive when I am trying to visit with guests. I just need a quick, easy trick that would nip this problem...?
3. Silly Bandz (the colorful shaped rubber bands)...are your kids crazy about them, too? My girls are loving collecting them, but I see them not treating each other kindly in their trading with each other. They each want to get the "better trade"--offering the most unwanted bracelet in exchange. Also, there is some bickering about how some "trades" were just loans, and now she wants her bracelet back, which the other sister completely denies...
4. When one sister gets a letter in the mail, the other one feels unjustly "persecuted" for not receiving a letter, too. And vice versa.
I realize these situations I've mentioned are just ways that children act because they are children. I'm not expecting perfection out of our girls at all. However, I see the seed of sibling rivalry, the constant competition between them taking root--and I want to do my very best in raising them to love each other.
One of our ultimate goals for our daughters is for them to be best friends. We realize at certain ages (like right now), the age gap might be too great for that to happen. But, as they grow and mature, that is our greatest hope for their relationship. That they would love each other like no other, depend on each other, and stick up for each other.
Our girls DO love each other, and many times we see them expressing that love by helping each other, happily playing together, and depending on each other. That just thrills our hearts!
But, the sibling rivalry? The constant competition between them? That totally stumps me.
Help?
